Do you remember the dating days? I do. When I was in ninth grade there was a girl that I liked very much. I didn’t have the guts to ask her myself if she liked me, so, I did what most cowardly ninth graders do – I asked a friend to ask her for me.
After a few days, my fried came to me with the news. He said, “Man, she said no.” I was devastated. I asked, “Well, why did she say no?” He replied something to the effect of, “She said that she didn’t really know you that well, and that she wants to keep her options open for the dance coming up.” I walked away sulking and a little upset. But I realized that she had every right to say no.
Over the years, I have seen and even embraced a view of evangelism that is very similar to the “dating” scene. God wants to be in a relationship with a people. He sends someone to tell the people. And the people have the choice to say yes or no. As an evangelist, we give them the facts about God and tell them that He is very much in love with them.
The issue however, goes deeper. We think that a person has the right to say no – and, that doing so is intelligible and reasonable. We hear things from the unbeliever like, “I surveyed all of the religions and Christianity just didn’t cut it.” Or, “I need to know more about this God before I make a decision.”
Comments like this are not innocently neutral, but ethically rebellious.
This “dating-game-evangelism” which says that a person who is single (or, without God) has every right to “play the field” or, to "choose God" like he/she chooses a partner in life, is completely foreign to the Biblical worldview.
The reality of the human condition is not that we are single until we choose a good mate; but rather, that we are married and we are presently committing adultery. A person who is married has no right whatsoever to “play the field.” A person who is married and who is in adultery has no grounds for “I’m trying to keep my options open” or "I need to know more" or whatever excuse they may have for not going home in repentance.
The message of the evangelist is therefore quite different. We are not approaching an unbelieving person as someone who is “single,” but one who is married. Every human was created by God and for God. Every human has fallen into adultery (or, from the glorious relationship with their Maker). Therefore, we do not say, “Hey, God loves you so much…will you consider a relationship with Him today?” Rather, we say (in a humble, tactful, and truthful way), “Hey, you are running from your Maker. Please repent. He is willing to forgive your adultery, and take you back unto Himself in Christ Jesus.”
And when the person says, “Ehhh…I need to know more about this God you speak of before I make a decision.” We now see how sinful and unreasonable such a response really is, especially in light of the truth that every person knows God, and that they suppress the truth in unrighteousness (Rom 1:18ff). Its like approaching a man caught in adultery, telling him to go home to his wife, and hearing him say, "tell me more about this girl (his wife!) and I might consider it." Our response is not to tell him about her - but to point to his wedding ring!
The fact is, a person cannot suppress what they are not touching. When you “suppress” a beach ball under the water, it may be out of sight, but you are actively applying force to it to keep it there. There is no neutral ground. A person either suppresses the truth or they embrace it - there is no in-between. They are either in a right relationship with God or they are in adultery. In essence, there are no true unbelievers - either they are believers who love God by faith in Christ, or they are believers who are in rebellion against Him.
Therefore, here is our gospel. We all must repent and believe. We must repent from our adultery, for we have chosen and loved other gods. We are adulterers. God, our Maker, because of the life, death and resurrection of Christ, is willing and ready to see us come home if we will repent of our adultery.
In short, as evangelists, we approach our unbelieving friend not by saying, “Hey, I know this God who loves you and desires a relationship with you.” That may be true - but, it is not the whole truth. Rather we say, “Get your but back home. God is waiting mercifully and with forgiveness for you. The Gate will not be open forever. Go now while there is still time!"
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